Beer Sucks, Drink Coolers!

When your nipples are getting hard with the excitement and anticipation of going on a hump run one question jumps to mind. "What will i drink to prepare for my hump time?" Now do not get me wrong. Vodka, Rye, Baileys and god knows how many other drinks have kept me alive during some lonely nights, but in this event we just have to say coolers come most recommended. Don't worry I won't leave you in suspense. I will disperse my reasons.... now.
 

Now when everyone thinks of coolers they think of one thing, a cold drink, often a mixture of white wine and juice. But you have to open your mind to realize just how perfect it is for this situation.

Let's have a quick review on what we think of coolers:

  • Tastes like liquid sugar, or some other type of candy based food.
  • Gets women (and some gay men) drunk. (after 1 of them; 2 is very drunk; 3 = yarfing)
  • Lowers morals and respect for clothing.

And now let's see what we require of a female pre-hump beverage:

  • Tastes like liquid sugar, or some other type of candy based food.
  • Get you drunk.
  • Lower morals and respect for clothing.

Hope you liked it.

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